Exploring Coincidence, Synchronicity and Deja Vu
By Chris Cathey
Copyright 2010

The best way that I have found to map the differences between these three experiences is to conjure up from one’s personal history an example of each.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be coincidental. For example one day I was at the office dealing with a file and I went back to put it back in the filing cabinet, just as I was leaving my office I bumped into a co-worker that was going to get the exact same file that I was getting ready to put back. That’s a coincidence.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be synchronistic. For example years back I was training with one of my very first models in NLP. He was a gentleman that was around with Bandler from the early days of NLP. He was at UC Santa Cruz, well I was having a lot of problems with him but I still wanted to learn the art. One day I had left a seminar that he was putting on. I was quite upset and was wondering to myself if I should even go back to the training. As I was driving I looked up and saw a license plate that said something to the effect of, ‘097 NLP’. I don’t actually remember what the numbers were but it was something like that, this was like back in 1999-2000. The important thing was that the license plate said… ‘NLP’ on it and I took it as a sign that I should stick it out and keep learning NLP.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be one of Déjà vu. For example one day I was walking around in my parent’s house I needed to ask my father a question. I walked into his room looked around, saw him sitting in his chair, I was about ready to ask him the question that was in my mind and then I was struck with the feeling of, ‘I’ve been here and done this before.” It was kind of a strange and eery feeling.
What do we notice in each of these examples? What do they all have in common?
Well in the first example I’m walking to put a file back. I have the intention in my mind to do that. In the second example I was wondering if I should continue learning NLP, I had a question in my mind and I was looking for direction of some sort. In the third example, I’m wanting to speak to my father about something; I have a question in my mind.
So first thing we notice is that I have some sort of intention that I’m acting on/ attempting to act on.
What the next thing that occurs in these examples? In the first example, I’m physically walking back to the file cabinet to put the file away. In the second example, I’m driving my car. Third example, I’m walking into my father’s bedroom to ask him a question.
So first I have some sort of intent or question that I’m thinking about. Second I’m doing something with this thought in the back of my mind.
What happens next?
In the first example, I bump into a co-worker, find out that they were going to get the file from the cabinet. I say, ‘well here it is.’ Smile and hand it over. I think to myself what a coincidence. I attach no special meaning to the experience.
In the second example, I am driving around I look and see a license plate that says ‘NLP’ on it. I ascribe a special meaning to it and apply it to my current situation. I take it to mean that I should continue studying NLP.
Third example, walking into my father’s room, see him sitting, notice what’s around us, hear myself start to ask him the question that’s on my mind. Then I think to myself, I’ve done this before. It feels weird, I think to myself, ‘wow what a weird feeling of Déjà vu’.
So in all examples certain things occur:
1.) I have an intention that is in my mind that I am focusing on.
2.) I am engaging in some sort of behavior that is geared towards that situation.
3.) An event occurs that seems to coincide with what I am thinking about.
4.) I ascribe some sort of meaning to the events: For coincidence, I think that there is nothing particularly meaningful about the experience. For synchronicity, I think that there is something meaningful about the experience. It becomes a meaningful coincidence if you will. For Déjà vu, I think,’Wow, this is odd, I’ve done this before.”
How do I explain this? Pattern Recognition. I’m thinking about something, it has certain elements to the experience. I’m operating in the world an event occurs that has certain elements. It fires an auto-associative pattern in my brain; I ascribe some sort of meaning to the event.
These are very useful processes and mechanisms to make use of. What if in the coincidence example as I’m carrying back the file to the cabinet and I’m thinking to myself about how my dog just died and I’m wondering is there anyone I can talk to about this that will understand and then I bump into that person looking for the same file. I think to myself, ‘It must be a sign’. What if in that same example, I’m going through those same motions and we bump into each other as they are looking for the file and it dawns on my, ‘wow this feels like we’ve done this before’. We have probably done something similar before in the past.
There’s a type of memory called Recognition Memory. I’ll give you an example; say for instance you see someone that you work with. Oh, that’s so and so or such and such. You know who they are and know their name. Take a different instance you see someone and you know them but say you can’t tell from where and you don’t remember their name but their familiar. Why? Because there is something familiar about the pattern of their face, or the way that they move or talk that your brain recognizes.
In recognition memory there is a Recognition/Familiarity distinction. Something can be recognized but not familiar such as a face, it can be familiar but not recognized and it can be recognized and familiar, and I suppose it can be not recognized and not familiar as well but I would catergorize that as a memory.
To me in these examples the difference that makes the difference is the intent that you set when operating in the world.
Déjà vu is a cool mystical spooky experience to play with though I have not found a practical application. Coincidence they happen all the time but we just don’t notice them and even when we do we take them as nothing all that amazing and special so I don’t really know that that experience is something to write home about. Synchronicity on the other hand, that’s seems like something that can be useful.
Basically, from my vantage point the pattern goes like this:
1.) Set an intention in your mind or ask yourself a question about something important that you’re wondering about.
2.) Enter a state of open awareness to the outside world. A good example of this would be like when you were a child and you’d see doing something and you’d start to mimic them. Essentially your tuning your senses to your environment, pay attention to the visual nuances that you experience in the world, the colors, the hues, notice how everything flows together, next become aware of the sounds around you, any echoes that you might here, notice the crispness of sound, and then tune your kinesthetics, notice your clothing, the temperature in the air, the movement and angle of your body and anything that your touching or that is touching you for that matter.
3.) With your intention/question in mind while your experiencing this state. Create a break state. Then do it again steps 1 and 2. And then do it again a couple more times.
4.) Then go through you day waiting for you brain to notice some sort of patterning.
5.) Ecology check – I would run a quick check on any ‘information’ that your brain picks up.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be coincidental. For example one day I was at the office dealing with a file and I went back to put it back in the filing cabinet, just as I was leaving my office I bumped into a co-worker that was going to get the exact same file that I was getting ready to put back. That’s a coincidence.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be synchronistic. For example years back I was training with one of my very first models in NLP. He was a gentleman that was around with Bandler from the early days of NLP. He was at UC Santa Cruz, well I was having a lot of problems with him but I still wanted to learn the art. One day I had left a seminar that he was putting on. I was quite upset and was wondering to myself if I should even go back to the training. As I was driving I looked up and saw a license plate that said something to the effect of, ‘097 NLP’. I don’t actually remember what the numbers were but it was something like that, this was like back in 1999-2000. The important thing was that the license plate said… ‘NLP’ on it and I took it as a sign that I should stick it out and keep learning NLP.
Choose one example in your life in which you had an experience of something occurring that seemed to be one of Déjà vu. For example one day I was walking around in my parent’s house I needed to ask my father a question. I walked into his room looked around, saw him sitting in his chair, I was about ready to ask him the question that was in my mind and then I was struck with the feeling of, ‘I’ve been here and done this before.” It was kind of a strange and eery feeling.
What do we notice in each of these examples? What do they all have in common?
Well in the first example I’m walking to put a file back. I have the intention in my mind to do that. In the second example I was wondering if I should continue learning NLP, I had a question in my mind and I was looking for direction of some sort. In the third example, I’m wanting to speak to my father about something; I have a question in my mind.
So first thing we notice is that I have some sort of intention that I’m acting on/ attempting to act on.
What the next thing that occurs in these examples? In the first example, I’m physically walking back to the file cabinet to put the file away. In the second example, I’m driving my car. Third example, I’m walking into my father’s bedroom to ask him a question.
So first I have some sort of intent or question that I’m thinking about. Second I’m doing something with this thought in the back of my mind.
What happens next?
In the first example, I bump into a co-worker, find out that they were going to get the file from the cabinet. I say, ‘well here it is.’ Smile and hand it over. I think to myself what a coincidence. I attach no special meaning to the experience.
In the second example, I am driving around I look and see a license plate that says ‘NLP’ on it. I ascribe a special meaning to it and apply it to my current situation. I take it to mean that I should continue studying NLP.
Third example, walking into my father’s room, see him sitting, notice what’s around us, hear myself start to ask him the question that’s on my mind. Then I think to myself, I’ve done this before. It feels weird, I think to myself, ‘wow what a weird feeling of Déjà vu’.
So in all examples certain things occur:
1.) I have an intention that is in my mind that I am focusing on.
2.) I am engaging in some sort of behavior that is geared towards that situation.
3.) An event occurs that seems to coincide with what I am thinking about.
4.) I ascribe some sort of meaning to the events: For coincidence, I think that there is nothing particularly meaningful about the experience. For synchronicity, I think that there is something meaningful about the experience. It becomes a meaningful coincidence if you will. For Déjà vu, I think,’Wow, this is odd, I’ve done this before.”
How do I explain this? Pattern Recognition. I’m thinking about something, it has certain elements to the experience. I’m operating in the world an event occurs that has certain elements. It fires an auto-associative pattern in my brain; I ascribe some sort of meaning to the event.
These are very useful processes and mechanisms to make use of. What if in the coincidence example as I’m carrying back the file to the cabinet and I’m thinking to myself about how my dog just died and I’m wondering is there anyone I can talk to about this that will understand and then I bump into that person looking for the same file. I think to myself, ‘It must be a sign’. What if in that same example, I’m going through those same motions and we bump into each other as they are looking for the file and it dawns on my, ‘wow this feels like we’ve done this before’. We have probably done something similar before in the past.
There’s a type of memory called Recognition Memory. I’ll give you an example; say for instance you see someone that you work with. Oh, that’s so and so or such and such. You know who they are and know their name. Take a different instance you see someone and you know them but say you can’t tell from where and you don’t remember their name but their familiar. Why? Because there is something familiar about the pattern of their face, or the way that they move or talk that your brain recognizes.
In recognition memory there is a Recognition/Familiarity distinction. Something can be recognized but not familiar such as a face, it can be familiar but not recognized and it can be recognized and familiar, and I suppose it can be not recognized and not familiar as well but I would catergorize that as a memory.
To me in these examples the difference that makes the difference is the intent that you set when operating in the world.
Déjà vu is a cool mystical spooky experience to play with though I have not found a practical application. Coincidence they happen all the time but we just don’t notice them and even when we do we take them as nothing all that amazing and special so I don’t really know that that experience is something to write home about. Synchronicity on the other hand, that’s seems like something that can be useful.
Basically, from my vantage point the pattern goes like this:
1.) Set an intention in your mind or ask yourself a question about something important that you’re wondering about.
2.) Enter a state of open awareness to the outside world. A good example of this would be like when you were a child and you’d see doing something and you’d start to mimic them. Essentially your tuning your senses to your environment, pay attention to the visual nuances that you experience in the world, the colors, the hues, notice how everything flows together, next become aware of the sounds around you, any echoes that you might here, notice the crispness of sound, and then tune your kinesthetics, notice your clothing, the temperature in the air, the movement and angle of your body and anything that your touching or that is touching you for that matter.
3.) With your intention/question in mind while your experiencing this state. Create a break state. Then do it again steps 1 and 2. And then do it again a couple more times.
4.) Then go through you day waiting for you brain to notice some sort of patterning.
5.) Ecology check – I would run a quick check on any ‘information’ that your brain picks up.